Marriage

The love of a man and a woman within the sacrament of marriage should be a beacon for all people to help them understand the true nature of love. St. Paul teaches that the closest we can get to understanding God's perfect love, is to witness the love that can exist between husband and wife. Although unfaithfulness and divorce mean that the ideal is often not fulfilled this does not mean that the ideal is wrong or that the nature of love is corrupted. The whole subject area of marriage, love, sex and children produces strong feelings in people and there is much disagreement and debate about what they mean and what responsibilities Catholics have. The Church gives strong teaching on these issues but it also recognises that each person has a conscience and must take responsibility for their actions.

Marriage Forever

The understanding that Catholics have of marriage as a sacrament means that the joining of two people is made holy by the presence of God. Mark 10:1-12 tells us of the special union that a couple share in marriage.

"Jesus then left that place and went into the region of Judea and across the Jordan. Again crowds of people came to him, and as was his custom, he taught them. Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?", "What did Moses command you?" he replied. They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away." "It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law," Jesus replied, "but at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.' 7 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. He answered, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery."

Sexual Intercourse is a sign of this union, where two become one. This means that even if both partners chose to break up the marriage is not over. As Mark says, 'what God has joined together let no one divide'. However, the fact that some marriages may be violent, abusive or full of unfaithfulness must be considered and these facts are viewed with compassion by all in the Catholic Church. At the moment the Church is pulled between two forces; on the one hand, marriage is a sacrament and a permanent institution, but marriage also involves human beings who sometimes fail in their promises. The Church provides guidance and counselling for those who experience marital difficulties. Two It is understandable to focus on the pitfalls of marriage especially if you have been part of a family that has broken up or have witnessed someone you love being hurt. It should be said, however, that many marriages are extremely happy and couples can be together for the majority of their lives, giving each other comfort and challenging each other to grow into fuller human beings. The ideal is still good even if the reality can sometimes fail to live up to expectations.such organisations are Marriage Care and A.S.D.C. (the Association for separated and divorced Catholics - website)

Divorce and Permanent Separation

When Catholics get married they marry legally and sacramentally. Like anybody, Catholics can get a legal divorce but this doesn't mean that the sacrament is finished. The teaching authority of the Church says that marriage is permanent. Catholics who are legally divorced or permanently separated are still bound by their marriage vows, this means that they cannot be remarried in a church. Divorced Catholics, especially those who start a relationship with a new partner can find that they are denied full participation in the life of the Church. The results of divorce for a Catholic can result in them being denied the Eucharist. The teaching authority of the Church always recognises that personal conscience is the final decider of right and wrong, as long as the person understands that they take responsibility for their actions. Some dioceses and parishes do allow divorced and remarried people to receive the sacraments. This situation may be stated openly because of strongly held beliefs or may be the turning of a blind eye out of compassion or necessity.

Annulment

An annulment is a pronouncement by the Church authorities that a marriage never was real. A detailed investigation into the nature of the relationship between the man and the woman is conducted. There are a number of reasons for granting an annulment, including, full physical relationships not having occured, marriage vows not being meant or one partner secretly not ever intending to have children.